this is weird.  i have windows 7 ultimate installed 64bit with WLM 2011 latest and also the latest version of plus.  well i use the sound sender all the time to send sounds to friends and family for some odd reason i can not send any sounds to this one person at all. it always says it cant send in RED.  i can send no problem with any one else but my brother.  very strange  so i did some research you have to have latest version of FLash installed for IE already did this it worked for a little while now doing the same thing again. 

I can't exactly help you with your problem, but I just want to ask something: You said you did research and found that you need to have the latest Flash version installed. Where did found this advise? Can you link to it?

Note: Flash does not have anything to do with how Messenger Plus! sends its sounds.

well i looked up the exact issue and someone said to have flash installed well messenger does use flash.  especially for IE latest version for IE 64bit given my box.  also messenger came up with a popup saying to install the latest version of flash click the link to take you to the site whcih was an adobe site but there was nothing to download yes it could be a phising site.

Windows Live Messenger uses flash for the Winks that you can send. Messenger Plus! does not use flash to send the emoticon sounds.

ok thats fine but then why does messenger come up with a pop up about installing latest flash. i already did this and the popup is gone now. would it be an issue with the other person using an older version of Messneger for xp like the 2009 one.

The problem you are experiencing has nothing to do with which version of flash is installed. The sound sending feature is apart of Messenger Plus! which is an add-on for Windows Live Messenger. It is not a feature native to Windows Live Messenger. Can you receive the sounds from your brother? You can screenshot the issue you are seeing when you try to send one?

ok let me send you a screen shot

here is the error