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Lassie Learns a Lesson - Printable Version

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Lassie Learns a Lesson by Dempsey on 01-23-2005 at 03:12 PM

     This dog walks into the butcher's shop one atfernoon, with a large basket in his mouth.  He jumps up onto the counter, puts the basket down and pulls a neatly folded note from within.  The butcher opens the note.  It reas: 'Please give the dog 1 lb of Cumberland sausages,  1 lb of smoky back bacon, half a dozon lamb chops, 2 lb of rump steak and three slices of gala pie.'
     The butcher weighs out the goods and puts them in the basket.  'That'll be £16.54, please.' he says to the dog, who takes a purse from the basket and counts out the exact money with his mouth.  The dog then nods his head in thanks, takes the basket back in his mouth, and leaves the shop.
     The butcher is stunned by the brilliance of this display - and even more so a week later, when the same thing happens.  A further week passes, and the same thing happens again, but this time the butcher shuts up the shop and follows the clever little dog as he trots through the streets.  He keeps behind the hound as he makes his way across busy intersections, always observing the Highway Code, until finally the dog walks up to a house, places the basket on the ground and knocks on the door with his paw.  The butcher is stunned by the intelligence of the canine.
     The door opens and a man in a stained wife-beater vest comes out and starts kicking the dog all over the pavement.  The butcher is horrified and runs the restrain the man.  'Stop!' he cries.  'Why are you beating such a clever little animal?'
     'He has to learn,' the man replies.  'This is the third time this month he's forgotten his keys.'


RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by Jhrono on 01-23-2005 at 03:16 PM

Ok this is sick Dempsey:S...


RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by ayjay on 01-23-2005 at 08:58 PM

Funny but not as funny as the others :)


RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by Phrive on 01-23-2005 at 09:04 PM

That's rather amusing, but he did deserve it come on, he didnt have a key!


RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by Jhrono on 01-23-2005 at 09:05 PM

wtf phrive u must be fu**ing stupid if ur serious:S....


RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by Phrive on 01-23-2005 at 09:06 PM

Of course im not serious :P

No i really aint, its a funny story though.


RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by ayjay on 01-23-2005 at 09:07 PM

How exactly could that be being serious? lol


RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by L. Coyote on 01-23-2005 at 09:07 PM

:P

Not funny, but not bad.


RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by Anubis on 01-23-2005 at 09:11 PM

Not that funny. The dog kicking spoils it, if he had started shouting "you stupid dog, you are the dumbest thing ever" and stuff like that, it may have been more amusing...but for all that, it had a little weak punch line, tbh...
I expected more than that, for shame :p


RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by saralk on 01-23-2005 at 09:16 PM

is the dog meant to be a metahpore for the mans wife, or am i reading too much into it?

i didnt really find it that funny tbh.


RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by ayjay on 01-23-2005 at 09:18 PM

no. just... a dog. :)


RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by Pipish on 01-24-2005 at 12:56 AM

i have to admit these jokes are getting less funier every time you post a new one

and with all the animal atacks goin on in ausralia atm i dont like that joke one bit


RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by WDZ on 01-24-2005 at 01:07 AM

quote:
Originally posted by Anubis
The dog kicking spoils it
Agreed.
RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by azn angel on 01-24-2005 at 10:06 AM

quote:
Originally posted by Pipish
i have to admit these jokes are getting less funier every time you post a new one

and with all the animal atacks goin on in ausralia atm i dont like that joke one bit
so true..
* azn angel thinks of the kitten getting tortured by a 14 yr old :x

RE: Lassie Learns a Lesson by user27089 on 01-24-2005 at 10:09 AM

IT wasn't the funniest thing I've ever read tbh... but it was okay... a little chuckle...