If you had a friend who had a female mate who he really got on with and stuff and they did stuff together like going to cinema and out to pub etc as mates quite a bit. 

As he got to know her more and more as a mate he started to realise that he didn't want to be just mates with the girl, but wasn't sure wether to say anything or not, because the friendship meant so much to him that he wouldn't want things to become awkward and then lose the mate althogether if she didn't feel the same.

What you other people do in the same situation?  So I can give my friend some advise.

tell her.... you dont want to get stuck in the "friends zone"

Been there once or twice, and I've learned that for me, the friendship will never be the same. But I have also seen the opposite outcome. My advice would be stick to friendship.

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Originally posted by Omar
tell her.... you dont want to get stuck in the "friends zone"

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Demps mate, if you feel worried enough about it becoming awkward it wouldn't. You obviously like her to much for sex or intamacy to spoil things. Go for it

I'm actually in that dilemma at the moment. I've simply decided that a friendship is more important to me rather than to try to move ahead and be more than friends. If I were to do that, and it didn't work out, I'd be screwed. I'd never be the same around her, it would be too awkward.

So my advice would be to tell him to just stick in the “friends” relationship.

well dempsey, are you sure the friend feels the same way about you. My GF now I have been dating for well over a year now and we are friends/ were friends to begin with. You just have to take it slow and be careful. Telling her how you feel and mutually deciding what to do is better I think.

go for the friendship, otherwise it can get really strange and you may lose that friend

Errr, I've been through this, except it's never been an issue
really.  I dated my best friend, that lasted 3-4 years, we did
good.  We broke up about 4 months ago, we're still best friends,
it hurt alot because the relationship was so serious.

People always say, NEVER date your best friend.  Well the way I
see it is that, why not date them, they make you happy, you two have a
good time, how are you going to find someone else that is just like
them?  Just my opinion.  I don't think it hurts, especially
because I've been in the situation, it really doesn't change much after
breaking up.

When my two friends dated, it was weird for them because when they
kissed, it felt like like they were just two friends kissing.  He
broke up with her, but a month or so later, he realized that he really
loves her, and he can't get her back at all.  The first girl he
ever fell in love with.

dodgy situation tbh.
It depends .... needs a lot of thought .... if he cant stand being with just friends with her then your "friend" should go for it .... else dont risk it tbh.
But thats just me. This is something that your "friend" needs to seriously think about.

Wasnt there a similar thread about a year back ???

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Originally posted by ipab
You just have to take it slow and be careful.

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I would say at least discuss it with said girl. At least then you can figure out where she stands. I know some say 'keep it as friends', but life's a game, and I sure as hell enjoy playing it So should everyone

Edit: _James_ agrees with me it seems

try and find out wethr she feels the same first before you say anything or it may ruin your friendship..

Ask her wether she considers you more than a friend?
And see what she says and carry on from there

if you are real friends, that will not affect your relationship if its denied.

quote:

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Originally posted by _James_
try and find out wethr she feels the same first before you say anything or it may ruin your friendship..

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come to think about it i'm getting there, i jsut started talking to some hot girl and she seems pretty friendly towards me so i'll see how that goes

quote:

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Originally posted by Msg Plus Freak
Ask her wether she considers you more than a friend?
And see what she says and carry on from there

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when it happened to me.

i just told her that i had feelings for her. and she didnt have them for me, and things are still fine

Go for it

Hit it up poontang style

lol seriously I am in that "friend zone" way too much some of them i rather be there others not so much. Sometimes you just have to take a risk, ask her what she would do if she developed feelings for you, would she tell you or would she shy back and keep it to herself.

Tell your friend to  Flirt with her and see what happends if she flirts back i think he should tell her how he feels.


I hope this works out for your "friend"

i would say go for the friendship..theres nothing more beautiful than that!

Thanks everyone for the replies

I still don't really know what I'm gonna do, I think I'm just gonna see what happens and who knows.

Cheers everyone

why not give her an annonomous valentines card?

if she asks wether its you then she will fancy you most likely

quote:

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Originally posted by Dempsey
still don't really know what I'm gonna do, I think I'm just gonna see what happens and who knows.

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haha busted

quote:

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Originally posted by damm-o

quote:

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Originally posted by Dempsey
still don't really know what I'm gonna do, I think I'm just gonna see what happens and who knows.

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the advice is for your friend, right?

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coming from a girl, if shes got msn, just make hints and tell her shes beautiful, see what kind of reply you get and go from there.

Msn < Face to Face

Friends are the present. Love is the future.

Just send her an e-mail and describe your feelings. It isn't personal, I know, but with an e-mail you can think about what to say and how, and when she reads it, she can think about it. I've done it and got a good relation for more then 2 years now. I know my girlfriend more then 6 years now, and it was just like you said, we started to do more things together, so I just told her my feelings and she felt the same

quote:

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Originally posted by XxRebelSeanxX

I'm actually in that dilemma at the moment. I've simply decided that a friendship is more important to me rather than to try to move ahead and be more than friends. If I were to do that, and it didn't work out, I'd be screwed. I'd never be the same around her, it would be too awkward.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Chrono
Go for it dempsey

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I say let her tell when the time is right.

go see the film just fiends dat wil give you some help as it is about that sort of posion