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Poll: Do you care if people insult you behind your back?
I don't mind if people say things behind my back; what I don't know can't hurt me
I always want the opportunity to defend myself, so I prefer they say it in front of me, even if it hurts
If it's something I can't control, I'd rather they say it when I'm not there, but if I can control it (like personality) then in front of me
If it's something I can control, I'd rather they say it when I'm not there, but if I can't control it (like looks) then in front of me
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Do you care if people insult you behind your back?
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Thor
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RE: Do you care if people insult you behind your back?
In the event of someone talking behind my back and the subject was my behaviour or something along those lines I would like to be told, instead of being kept in the dark. Improvement doesn't come without suggestions and complaints. Of course, if someone just think I'm a douche, then I'm obviously not going to stop them believing that, after all we do live in a world with (none (and semi-)) free speech. Everyone are entitled to have their thoughts around people.

What I can't stand is the type that talk behind other peoples back (really often) and behaves completely different around that particular person. It's really annoying and I think it is a negative "feature".
I'd rather ignore the whole person, confront the person or be happy ever after and not bitch about it. It doesn't really help.

However, I am by far any angel. I have talked behind other peoples back, not negatively or with disrespect but simply discussing others. I do not find that to be a negative thing as long as one is able to keep on the subject without being disrespectful.

Just my cents.
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05-01-2008 06:15 PM
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Voldemort
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RE: Do you care if people insult you behind your back?
a person who insults others behind their backs is not a person that deserves attention - i honestly don't care, but I'd say I'd rather know, just to know who not to associate with. as Clarice said:

quote:
Originally posted by Haz
My principle is that if you say something bad about someone when they're not there, be willing to say it also in their presence.

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05-01-2008 07:45 PM
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Nathan
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RE: Do you care if people insult you behind your back?
Erm, what i don't know doesn't hurt me i suppose, but if they say it too my face, i try not to take it to heart unless it's someone close to me like a good friend etc. I either laugh it off or try and throw one back at them :p

I used to wear glasses, and the only insult they could come up with was 4 eyes or something, so since I've had contacts I haven't had any problems so its allll good :p

I'd prefer to know who said it about me, and what they said, so I know who it is and if I can talk to them to see what their problem is, or if they're taking the piss lol.

This post was edited on 05-01-2008 at 09:16 PM by Nathan.
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05-01-2008 09:15 PM
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Willz
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RE: Do you care if people insult you behind your back?
I'm the sort of person where if I'm going to say something I will, like I don't go around insulting people but when I do have to insult someone its direct because its more honest and gives you a chance to hear that persons point of view or make them know you dislike them.

Its pretty much what has been said before:

quote:
Originally posted by Haz
My principle is that if you say something bad about someone when they're not there, be willing to say it also in their presence.

I really don't care if people insult me behind my back. I say things and act the way I act because its how I am, I'm not here to please everyone :P

Generally most people that do things behind peoples backs have it blow up in their face in one way or another in the end.
05-02-2008 01:15 AM
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John Anderton
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RE: Do you care if people insult you behind your back?
There should be a "I am least bothered" option. If they say it in front of me, I'll react if I feel the need. If its worth having a debate over, sure, I'll talk about it else just move on. If the person says it behind my back, as dishonorable as that is, he should have the guts to say it to my face. If he does, refer to answer given above else... well the person sucks too much/is a coward and either way, isn't worth me saying anything about.
Hope that makes sense :)
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05-02-2008 09:01 AM
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Baggins
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RE: Do you care if people insult you behind your back?
I would like to have somebody say something to my face. Sitting beside people in class while they say things about people yet pretend to be friendly face to face with that person, pisses me off.

When somebody does make a serious (as in they're not just joking around) insult to my face, I can win in a verbal fight/argument/debate. That is, unless they are somebody who is so stubborn and non-sensical with their arguments that my brain starts to hurt from trying to comprehend the verbal diarrhea they're spewing all over me. (Yeah, I get a bad picture in my head while reading that too :p)

Take for example silly little arguments about whom is smarter:
"You're stupid." (Actually serious)
"And of course you've got a degree in quantum mechanics (8-))"
"I'm way smarter than you." (Actually serious)
"At what?"
"I... I've got more street smarts than you." (Actually serious)
"And tell me, when in life is knowing where to buy drugs going to get you anywhere? ^o)"
"Well... You're stupid." *Walks away* (Yeah... He's actually serious)

I try to be serious about my school work, follow the rules, and just generally stay away from the people who do stupid shit.
05-03-2008 01:09 AM
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vaccination
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RE: Do you care if people insult you behind your back?
quote:
Originally posted by John Anderton
There should be a "I am least bothered" option. If they say it in front of me, I'll react if I feel the need. If its worth having a debate over, sure, I'll talk about it else just move on. If the person says it behind my back, as dishonorable as that is, he should have the guts to say it to my face. If he does, refer to answer given above else... well the person sucks too much/is a coward and either way, isn't worth me saying anything about.
Hope that makes sense :)
agreed with JA
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05-03-2008 06:54 AM
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