Shoutbox

i have local host listening to itself on ports 5226 and 1033 and i cant seem to block it by firewall.  could this be related

Also try Spybot S&D...

On a side note, there might be some remote desktop software...

How do you know the person is listening? and btw, don't triple post.

The offending party knew specific details of a conversation i was in the process of having with someone else

Is it possible that the offending party is watching your contact's conversation?

yes it is possible, how can i isolate which person is being spied on?  It appears as though the offending party also has the ability to prevent a new network connection, masked or otherwise, from appearing on the list of active connections that is displayed by netstat.  She hacks into my girlfriends screen name and has a conversation with me, and my connection list only shows my girlfriends IP addy.  She also managed to activate my gf's webcam on yahoo msgr remotely.

Sounds like some kind of trojan or some kind of vnc type session. Run a virus scan.

Check out your gfs computer as soon as you can.