Shoutbox

ill write my problem with folder syncrhonizations here because i dont want to open another thread.
i use xp sp2 with the latest updates. messenger version 8.0812, with messenger plus latest version. i use zonealarm, latest version as a firewall and nod32 as antivirus latest version also.
when i open my shared folders with me girlfriend it cannot synchronize, both systems are ntfs and use the same programmes as above. i tried to disable/enable both windows and zonealarm firewall, activete/deactivate nod32. i tried to use all the combinations. i sent email in microsoft, made a clean uninstall and install of messenger, tried to upgrade and downgrade the program. nothing happens....
i dont know what else to do. the only thing i did not made until now is the format (sorry for my english), but i dont want to format my disk.
sometimes when i dont look at it, once a week! it starts to synchronize without doing something on my pc!!! all wanted ports are open in both routers.
second proble is that sometimes i lose my buddies pictures. i have not activetes in privacy tab the one says "do not cache ......"
any solution?